As if there isn’t enough to do, we have to now navigate Christmas with menopause!
If you’re in a relationship, your partner will be probably be affected more than anyone else by menopause.
I had difficulty understanding menopause and therefore couldn’t explain anything to my partner. If you already understand your own menopause, then be brave and speak up. Your partner’s crystal ball may be a little hazy at the moment!
For my part, we ended up shouting at each other so before war breaks out in your household, here are twelve tips for a Happy Christmas.
Not quite The Twelve Days of Christmas…too much alcohol involved, but please read them with a smile! 😊
🎄 Drink more Gin – it gives courage (Warning: think carefully before engaging your gob as rubbish can spill out).
🎄 Drink Champagne – less calories – comes with the same warning but may help you get your s**t together!
🎄Open up the conversation about menopause: Copy and paste our Venus O, print out, cut out, paste onto old Christmas cards (which you had forgotten to recycle), add sparkles, cut out and hang one, or several, on your Christmas tree.
🎄Avoid arguments! Especially after someone opens up the conversation on menopause.
🎄 Relations can be a nightmare at Christmas – perhaps you might be better off getting away from it all somewhere else in the world.
🎄 If you’re stuck with it, wear a smile on your face ALL DAY. Glue it on, if necessary 😊 Well, at least until you fall asleep after that blow-out Christmas lunch.
🎄 If someone forgets to put the oven on (it happens!) make sure you have jacket potatoes, tins of baked beans and lots of bread, and lots of chocolate and other unsuitable products, as a standby.
🎄 Say a Big Thank you for the Gifts you receive and Smile 😊 (even if they will be dropped off at the Charity Shop after New Year)
🎄 The alcohol may lead you to believe you want sex. Make sure you have a lubricant close by.
🎄 If you fancy sex with someone else. Be discreet!
🎄 Feel Free, Feel Liberated. You are going through a metamorphosis and will emerge into Fabulousness!
🎄 Put off calling your lawyer. Don’t think about Divorce until after 6th January.
And, finally, if you couldn’t wait and have called your lawyer, refrain from further action until you’ve read our Menopause Guide to Divorce in our next newsletter in January 2020.
Until then, try and have a great Christmas. It only happens once a year. Think of it as a bit like Brussels sprouts – don’t overcook or you’ll end up with smelly farts!